Soul's Shadow

The farther away we got, the more we found ourselves inside a forest. The trees stood wide apart and let almost all the moonlight shine through. We reached what might have been the walls of an old castle once, but everything that was left were rough stones and only a few wall parts that were recognisable as such. One was low enough for me to hop on and let my feet dangle.

The Master stepped in front of me, all curious and with a playful smile on his lips. "What do you think?"

"Of this? I don't even know," I confessed, laughing. "It's so weird. And… a little exciting. I wish I knew how to manipulate it."

"Why not just watch and enjoy?"

"Says you." I giggled and poked his chest. "You'd burn everything down would I let you."

His grin grew wide and he put his hands to either side of me on the stones. "And why not. The red shine would suit this place nicely, don't you think?"

He was so close, I could feel the heat of his skin and his breath ghosting over my lips. Even in a dream I could feel my heartbeat speeding up at the proximity.

"Yeah, it would," I mumbled, almost feeling his lips on mine. "Fire and moonlight." He was even closer now. "And ruins." My eyes closed, skin meeting skin in a slow, sensual kiss.

There was no urge behind his movements, but a different kind of fire shone through, one that coaxed me into opening up and letting him dip his tongue between my teeth, not speeding up at all, only enjoying the sensations of the kiss. And gods, I could get lost in this. I didn't even struggle when his hands snaked under my plaid shirt to land on my sides, his thumbs slowly stroking my skin and wandering up ever so slightly. Only when his fingers brushed the underside of my breasts did I break the kiss, giving him a look that was probably equally questioning as it was warning.

"Stop playing with me," I grumbled.

His look was quite intense, one corner of his mouth twitching upwards to a teasing smirk. "Why would I be playing?"

I scoffed and folded my arms. "Cause you think it's fun to point out just how human I am."

"Maybe. But I think I just discovered an interesting detail."

"Yeah? That you're superior and far above such human desires? Bugger off and let me sleep."

To my surprise, he actually laughed at that, retreating a little, but only to tower over me like a looming shadow. "Well, it's true. But you might be getting something wrong."

"Not sure I really want to know." There was a great deal of stubbornness emerging from somewhere, building a wall around myself. The scene he had made in the bath had been lesson enough for me and I was in no mood to play his stupid games again. "All I know is that you're not interested in something as primitive as sex and yet you keep pushing my buttons cause you find it infuriatingly funny to remind me that I have little control over what my body does. On its own, mind you."

"On its own? You do fancy me," the Master noted, smile stretching.

I shrugged, trying to hide the speed of my heart. "So? Finding you attractive doesn't mean anything. Now stop being annoying. I can definitely respect what others want or don't want."

"Aaaand that's where you're wrong, lil' lumin." He had way too much fun with the situation and when I raised a questioning brow he put a finger to his lips as if he actually had to think about something. And maybe he had, because it took a moment before he continued speaking. "You're not always hungry, are you?"

I blinked at him. "Uh… no. Of course not."

"And when you're not you couldn't be bothered by food. Cause you don't need it."

I tilted my head, not sure where this was going.

"But imagine you'd walk by something that smells absolutely delicious and…" He lowered his hand and poked my belly. "Your stomach would start growling from it, no matter what."

My eyes wandered between the spot where he had poked me, up to meet his eyes. And suddenly it made sense and I let out an, "Oh."

"Maybe not the best comparison." He shrugged.

"So… Time Lords don't have sexual desire on their own. But it can be triggered, so to speak," I concluded, and he nodded. "And… uh… so… Wait, is that why you're teasing me all the time?"

"Nah, that's just for fun. I'd never touch you." He laughed so loud, it echoed through the night.

I sighed, rubbing a hand over my face. Absently I noticed that I wasn't wearing glasses and for a second it felt weird, but then I remembered to toss an annoyed glance at the man before me. "What's the point in telling me all this?" I grumbled. "Sod off."

"Not while you're awake anyway."

"What?"

The smirk was back and something else I couldn't place. "Sometimes you're so clever. And other times you're plain stupid, little one."

So, back to insults again. "Yeah, whatever." I sighed and hopped from the wall,trying to squeeze myself past the Master to get some space.

I didn't manage, however. He swiftly grabbed my wrist and held me back, snickering. "Don't run off."

"What do you want?" I called out, angry and confused by the whole situation.

"I just told you."

"No, you didn't." Or did he? Well, now that I thought about it, it was sort of obvious and my heart jumped right to my throat, all ire gone. I licked over my dry lips, having a hard time looking him in the eyes. "But… last time you were really pissed about it. And we didn't even… Not really."

This time he didn't laugh at me. Instead, his forehead gently nudged against mine. "I said, I'm not pissed. Just careful. You do remember what I told you, don't you?"

"'Bout what?"

His thumb stroked over my bottom lip and he leaned closer, yet not close enough for another kiss. "Nerve endings, little light. The more the stronger the connection. And you remember how deep we tumbled and how far we went from just a kiss alone."

My breath hitched and I remembered all too well. The moment when our minds had tumbled, when he had tried to force his way in and I had let him stumble and fall, fall so deep we almost didn't find our way back. How impossible would it be not to get lost while… I swallowed, nodding slightly. A gentle smile curved his lips.

"Have you any idea," he murmured, almost whispering against my lips, "how hard it was to keep our minds from falling when I had you in my lap?" And in that dim candle light by the piano they actually had been falling, more than once. For the fraction of a second, but they had. "How hard it was not to go much further than what we did?" His voice got even lower. "How hard it was to keep control over us both, my silly little flame?"

Crap. No, I had not considered any of that. And his behaviour right now made it almost impossible not to react in any way. My breath got heavier, my pulse faster, I swallowed again. "I… no." I had to close my eyes to steady myself, but he didn't allow me to, catching my lips for the briefest of moments. And it felt entirely too good. "Why didn't you tell me?" I managed to ask.

"What for?" He propped his nose against mine, glaring at me through widened pupils.

I huffed. "Would have made things a little easier. And I wouldn't have worried all the time."

"Worried? Why would you? I told you not to bother."

"Then you're more stupid than I." My hands pushed against his chest to get him away, but he didn't budge. "Told you. Don't care who you are. Everyone deserves to be treated well. And with respect. 'M not going to be an arse."

"Always take an opportunity when it presents itself to you," he murmured against my mouth and then swallowed every protest I might have, grabbing my hands from his chest to suddenly wrap his arms around my torso and heave me up the wall again, my bum landing hard on the stones when he sat me down.

He kept my tongue busy, making me feel the smile he wore and then something else entirely when he stepped between my legs and snaked a hand back under my shirt to press me against him. I gasped into his mouth, too aroused to stop, but still too aware to proceed. And gods know I wanted this to happen. Badly.

But with what he had just told me, there was no way we could take that risk. I didn't have the physical strength, nor the willpower, to push him away, so I reached out with my mind to at least nudge him and…

…nothing happened.

Confused, I really started to struggle now, pushing against him with both hands until he broke the kiss, breath as heavy as mine. "You just…" I panted, swallowing some air. "...said it's dangerous."

His hands hadn't vanished from under my clothes and he made me shudder with another stroke along my side. "It is." He giggled, almost sounding a little deranged. "And you're completely untrained. And for some reason able to initiate contact." His right thumb drew small circles over my hip bone, dangerously close to my underwear. "That makes everything entirely unpredictable."

I pretty much gaped at him, not knowing what to even say. This was insane and his god damn hands didn't make it any easier, neither did his lips that slowly kissed their way from my jaw to my collar bone. Shit, I was really far gone by now, just from how utterly unexpected this all was.

"Tell me you want me," he murmured against my neck, the vibration of his voice shooting right to my core.

He knew. Of course he knew. It was impossible to deny. I raked a hand through his soft hair, not sure if I should keep him there or push him away. "I do," came my rasped out reply. And then, simply because I knew he would like it to be said out loud, "I want you, Master."

He dragged his teeth along a pulsing vein in my neck, pressing me firmer against his erection to make me feel how the words affected him. "Good," he growled. "You know how to play."

He wouldn't stop, I realised. And every fibre in me was ready to give in. Almost.

"What're… this could kill us," I brought out, clinging to the last thread of sanity left.

The Master only chuckled against my skin and drew his head up to meet my eyes. "Told you, I just found out a tiny detail."

"What d'you mean?"

"You didn't want to hear it before," he taunted in a sing-sang voice, the tip of his tongue between his teeth. There was a touch of madness on his face, giving him a boyish look that made him entirely too attractive.

"Now I do. Before you kill us both."

"Not the worst way to die."

I groaned and this time not because of his hands. "Master," I warned.

"You should use my name more often." Said hands now gripped both of my sides, sprawling on my skin and… nothing else happened. "Didn't you notice? Something's missing. It's not happening, not there and not possible."

"Wha… what do you… mean?"

"We can't connect in a dream." He giggled again, catching my lips shortly. "Our minds are already woven together. And those bodies aren't real."

I blinked with an open mouth. Suddenly it all made sense and my heart leapt to my throat, my hands against his chest slowly falling lower. I watched his eyes going darker, the hinted smile still on his lips. I cursed myself for finding him so attractive, but right now… I couldn't bother less.

"You mean…" I mumbled, hooking my fingers into his belt loops. "... It's perfectly safe now?" A twinkle in his eyes confirmed my words and I had to suppress a shudder. "And before it wasn't, but… you actually wanted to? The whole time already?"

His tongue darted out and over his lips as I drew him against me. "Not the whole time." He stopped playing with me and paid his attention to the buttons of my shirt instead, slowly, deliciously popping one open. "Maybe for a while." Another button followed.

"Thought humans are disgusting," I taunted, tugging his t-shirt out from his jeans.

"Most of'em." The last button was open and, opposite to him, I wasn't wearing anything underneath. Not even a bra, as I now realised. "You barely count."

"That's almost a compliment." I reached up to swipe his open button-down from his shoulders, then snaked my hands under his t-shirt, stroking over the fine hair below his navel and wandering higher, over his belly and up to his chest, enjoying how he shivered at my touch before he pulled the cloth over his head to toss it aside.

Before I could marvel at the sight he dipped his head, catching my lips in a hungry kiss, not hiding his desire in any way. I matched his movements, played with his tongue and slipped a hand between  us to cup the bulge in his pants, humming when he sucked in a breath and rocked against me a few times.

This definitely isn't happening, I thought for a short moment, but then decided that I didn't care if it was only a dream…

"What's there to grin about?" he asked, brushing the now open shirt from my shoulders.

"The thought that this might be a regular dream after all." I tugged at his belt, opening the buckle. "And you're still sleeping and squirming because you have to watch this."

I felt him twitch against me and he inhaled sharply, a dangerous grin splitting his face. Fuck! That one turned me on more than everything he had physically done so far. "I'd wake you long before it'd get to this," he taunted, stroking a thumb over one of my nipples. "And then use it against you every minute of the next months." His fingers twirled and stroked and made me shiver, much to his obvious joy.

My own fingers continued where they had left, opening the belt fully and pulling down the zipper of his pants. The button followed and this time I didn't hesitate to pull at his boxers, freeing his erection and casting a curious look down.

"Satisfied?" the Master giggled.

"After what secret you made around it…" I tossed an amused look at him. "I'd say it's awfully unremarkable."

He barked out a laugh. "It was too funny having you getting knots in your head over what I might have in my pants."

"Well." I stroked a finger along his shaft, stopping his laugh abruptly. "It's good to know what I'm dealing with." And there I took him in my hand and slowly stroked him up and down, then circled the tip with my thumb, enjoying his sharp breaths and light shuddering.

"It's a shame-" he breathed- "that you won't feel the bruises tomorrow." The ones his fingers left on my sides, before they wandered lower to deal with my jeans. "C'mon, it's your dream. I bet you can get us somewhere… more comfortable."

I lifted myself up a little to allow him to undress my pants and felt the raw stone dig into my skin. Definitely not the most comfortable place, that's for sure. But it was difficult to divert my attention from his fingers that now slipped between my legs, stroking over my folds in sensual movements. And when he pushed a finger inside me, I didn't care anyway, clutching at his arms with shuddering breaths.

"Guess I'm not being fair here," he muttered against my lips, starting to pump in and out of me, his thumb circling my clit at the same time and positioning himself in a way that denied me every space to continue playing with him. "I just love to see you surrender." He kissed the corner of my mouth, wandering lower to suck at my neck and then gently kissing over the bruised spots. "Love how you give me control over you."

I let out a groan, not able to physically do much more than holding onto his arm with a firm grip, feeling a familiar pressure coiling in me, his fingers hitting all the damn right places. Maybe I even whimpered his name, I didn't care, didn't pay attention. He was all over me, his fingers, his lips, the mere proximity of him, overloading my body with sensations, making me arch against his hand as I got closer and closer and-

"Not so fast, little one." Suddenly his fingers retreated from me, leaving me panting and my muscles clenching around nothing, as I was not yet there, but so, so close to tipping over the edge that I whimpered out a protest. The Master chuckled, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "Don't be greedy."

"I hate you," I moaned, slumping against his shoulder.

"Can live with that." He snickered. "But I do have some standards. So let's move somewhere else."

My head cleared a little and I managed to focus my attention somewhat. A nicer place. Right. Somewhere comfortable, familiar. I took a long breath in and closed my eyes.

"Oh, not bad. But that dresser is actually over there."

I blinked and saw his hand pointing at said furniture. We were in his room and yes, a few things were probably displaced and others probably made no sense at all. I shrugged, letting myself fall backwards and onto the soft sheets.

"Wouldn't have happened with my own room. But you have the bigger bed." And I simply loved how everything in here smelled like him. I winked at the Master and dug my elbows into the sheets to drag myself fully on the mattress.

He watched, letting his eyes wander over me. If he found me attractive in any way was hard to tell. I knew my body wasn't the prettiest, after having lost weight too fast and never having been particularly in shape. But it didn't seem as if he cared about that. He himself was well built, not visibly muscular, but defined and definitely something to look at. And he definitely wasn't bothered at all by being naked, showing no shame at all.

It didn't take the Master long to climb on the bed too, crawling above me to look down with a smirk. "That what you imagined?" he asked, voice low. "In all that little bubbles you hid from me?"

I swallowed, reaching a hand up to stroke over his chest. "Dunno. I never… not that vividly. 'T was all more vague and less… image."

"So you did imagine. Filthy little thing." He chuckled and pushed a knee between my legs to part them, settling himself there, eyes black from his widened pupils. "Look at me," he demanded.

And I did, never took my eyes off him, even when I wanted to close them to savour the sensation of his length teasing my folds and his tip sliding over my clit. His look was intense, as if he didn't want to miss a single expression, not one of my heavy breaths, as if this was his substitute for a real connection we couldn't share right now. The intensity of his eyes set every nerve in my body on fire and made it tingle from anticipation.

Slowly the Master inhaled and pushed himself inside me, deliciously dragging out the moment. A soft moan flew from my lips and his own eyes fell shut, maybe mine too, when he was sheathed completely inside of me, waiting a moment so I could adjust.

I felt him shift to lower himself and there were lips on mine as soon as he started to move, his mouth swallowing my moans, barely suppressing his own. There was the pounding of his hearts against my chest and one of his hands grabbed both of mine, pinning them above my head, just firm enough to tell me not to struggle. I arched into his rhythm, wrapped my legs around him to get him closer still. This was so much better than anything I had dared to half dream of and he knew how to move just right to hit all the places that made me gasp and shudder.

"Say my name," he grunted, propping his sweaty forehead against mine and punctuating his words with rough thrusts. "I want it… pray it," he demanded.

And I did, eventually, after contemplating to disobey for the shortest of moments. "Master," I moaned, not wanting to give him any reason to stop, arching into him once again, wanting more control, but being too aroused from the restraint I usually hated so much. But I knew I was safe with him and that did more to me than I was willing to admit.

He wrapped his other hand around my middle, lifting me up slightly to get another angle and with that he hit a spot that made me see sparks and gasp, unable to remember if anyone had ever managed to make me feel like that. His rhythm was rough, but also deliberate, like waves crashing over me, my senses, my whole awareness. At some point he let go of my hands, placing his fingers on my temple and cursing when nothing happened, his disappointment in that moment almost as palpable as if the connection had worked. Instead he gently bit into my neck, eliciting another moan from me and driving me so close to the edge that I almost tipped over, but not yet, not quite. His movements got less controlled, more frantic.

"Come for me, little light," he panted near my ear, catching my mouth in a sloppy kiss.

I couldn't help a huff that merged with a groan. "You watch too much porn," I taunted, breathing heavily.

He giggled against my collar bone, sending the vibrations through my whole body. His thrusts were slowing down a little and he angled himself just slightly differently while sucking another mark into my skin at the most sensitive spot on my neck he could find.

And it was all it was needed for me to see stars and feel the coil in my abdomen snap and ripple through me. I moaned out the pleasure that only intensified with every new thrust and I felt him tense and still shortly after, panting heavily with his forehead now pressed against mine and shivering deliciously. And somehow we were both still moving ever so slightly, drawing out every moment to its last, unwilling to let go until my vision blacked out and my awareness snapped back from the dream into my real body.

The waking world suddenly crashed over me, the lights, the smells, the material of the sleeping bag. But somehow my orgasm was still shaking me and I had to press my face into the Master's shirt to stifle another groan.

It took a few seconds to fully recover, all while the Master held me tightly against himself. Eventually, though, I let out a last shaky breath and quietly laughed. "I thought that was a dream," I mumbled into his shirt, my body coming down from the rush. "How can I still feel it here?"

The Master chuckled, his thumb stroking gently over my back. "Guess it's because you've woken yourself up. Be quiet or someone'll hear you."

Well, I had no intention to let that happen, so I kept my face buried against his chest, not only to calm down, but also because I wasn't willing to give up on the closeness, yet; the warmth and the safety and just the shere unlikeliness of the whole situation.

And neither did the Master, his thoughts shooting through my mind like an echo of my own. I remembered his hand on my skin and the connection we had shared the whole time, and somehow, now, it felt as deep and as complete as it had never before.