Osgood lay on her back in Kate’s bed, the comforting weight of a sleeping body sprawled on top of her, blonde hair fanned out over her neck and tickling slightly each time Kate breathed. Every once in awhile Osgood would shift, just a little bit, so that new bits of her bare skin would touch new bits of Kate’s bare skin, and wow. Wow. Wow.
She could feel a dumb grin settling itself onto her face, and she didn’t care. She wanted to jump up and dance around and shout things from rooftops–well, except of course that that would mean getting up, and she was quite happy to stay right where she was for the foreseeable future.
It all seemed very impossible–that she had done this, and that she had done this with Kate. Kate. Wow. She kept trying to reframe the information in a way that made sense: Kate and I slept together. Kate and I made love. Kate and I had sex.
Rather surprisingly athletic sex, actually.
Osgood was the one who had kissed her first at the office, because despite appearances Osgood was the one who in moments of heightened adrenaline was capable of single acts of stunning courage, and/or stupidity.
Kate was the one who had kissed her back, because Kate’s courage was the kind that made choices as soon as the die was cast, and stuck to the course come hell or high water.
It was a good kiss.
When they finally broke apart, Osgood had ducked her head into Kate’s neck to hide her blush.
“I don’t want to go back to my flat tonight,” Osgood had said, because apparently she hadn’t used up the last bit of her courage on that kiss after all.
Kate chuckled low and dry in a way that made pleasant little vibrations against Osgood’s cheek.
“I don’t believe that will be a problem,” she said.
The car ride had been almost completely silent, everything unspoken but as known and inevitable as the law of thermodynamics, the air thick with the knowledge of what they were going to do. Kate was so close; it was no closer than they would have been sitting together in the car any other day, but it suddenly seemed extremely close. Osgood had felt herself wound tight as a coil; she didn’t know where to look with her eyes, she didn’t know what to do with her hands.
She had very badly wanted to touch Kate with her hands, but Kate was driving.
At a red light, Kate had let her left hand rest on the edge of her seat, and Osgood had taken it. She felt the fingers tense, and she thought for a moment that she had made a mistake; she started to pull away.
Kate had interlaced their fingers and gave a brief squeeze before the light turned green and she let go.
At the next red light, Kate had leaned over and pressed a brief but fervent kiss to Osgood’s cheek.
Osgood felt that spot tingle on her cheek for miles.
Kate had slid Osgood’s coat off her shoulders in a gesture of gallantry that had made Osgood’s stomach do flips, hanging it on the coat-rack before shedding her own jacket and hanging it alongside. Osgood looked at the two coats sitting side by side, and her stomach did more flips. It was happening. It was really, actually happening.
And then Kate’s fingers had entwined with hers again, and Kate had been looking at her with a little crooked smile that was equal parts anticipation and wonder, and Osgood would have done anything for Kate to never stop looking at her that way. She let Kate lead her to the bedroom, a moon falling into the orbit of a planet. Kate turned on the bedside lamp, golden light spilling over the navy blue quilt and the pale walls lined with pictures of Kate’s children. The bed creaked slightly as they sat down together on the edge, and Kate leaned her forehead against Osgood’s, and oh, that was nice. The way they were just sitting together, breathing together, holding hands. It was a lot of things happening all at once, not too many things but enough things that Osgood’s heart was beating very rapidly, her breath coming very short. She could hear Kate’s breath coming very short too, and that just made her own heart beat faster. So many things were happening right now, and soon even more would be happening, and those would be things in which Osgood had no confidence in her skill at all.
And then Kate had leaned in further for a kiss, and Osgood flinched slightly.
Kate pulled back a bit, her eyes searching. “Do you not want…”
“I do!” Osgood said hastily. She looked down at her hands, where they were touching Kate’s hands. “It’s just, um. Sex. I don’t have it a lot.”
“Ah.” Kate squeezed her hand gently again, thumb stroking over the back of her palm. Her voice was soft. “Would you like some now?”
Osgood swallowed hard. “Yes.”
Despite that declaration, they hadn’t had sex immediately. They had continued to sit there together instead, foreheads resting against each other, stroking each other’s arms and backs and shoulders.
Osgood had nestled her face back into Kate’s neck, sliding her arms around her and pulling her close, tight. Kate smelled so good, felt so warm. She felt safe there.
Kate had pressed slow kisses against her forehead. Murmured, “I’m not going to make you do anything.”
“I know,” Osgood had said. And she did. It was just–hard to explain, how you could want something so much and be scared of it, a little, at the same time.
She had nuzzled Kate’s collarbone instead, and reveled in the feel of Kate’s fingertips tracing the length of her spine.
“Just tell me when you like something,” Kate had said. “And when you don’t like something. All right?”
And Osgood had nodded.
So they had gone on touching and kissing, and checking with each other once in awhile–Is that all right?–Ticklish, a bit–and after awhile, Osgood had started angling towards lying down, and Kate had taken the hint, and they had lain down next to each other on the bed. They carried on, and the stroking started to hint a little bit more at the hems of shirts and slacks. Kate pressed her lips to Osgood’s collarbone, then kissed her way up her neck until she found her lips, and then they were kissing as fiercely as they had back in the office, that glorious moment when there had been no words rattling around Osgood’s head but alive alive alive, alive after all and Kate, Kate, Kate! And now Kate was kissing her that way again, like snogging was going to banned tomorrow, like Osgood’s lips were water in a desert, and every touch of lip and tongue was an irresistible demand to kiss back, and Osgood did not even contemplate resistance.
Hands were wandering much more freely now too, albeit still over clothes, and Osgood found that most of the time it was easy to tell when Kate liked something, and if the feedback was unclear–Kate sucking in a breath as Osgood’s palm brushed over her breast, her face looking slightly pained–Osgood only had to say, “Is that…” and Kate would say “Yes, just like that, please” and talking would once again become superfluous.
One of Osgood’s hands had slipped, and there was the near-electric shock of the feel of Kate’s bare skin, just above her hip. She wheezed.
“Inhaler,” Kate had said, sitting up.
“No, no, it’s fine.” Osgood had felt all the blood rushing to her face.
Kate had studied her, her concern written all over her face. She traced a line down Osgood’s cheek. “You have it handy?”
“My pocket,” Osgood had said, and took it out and put it on the end table before lying back down.
After that first time, it had proved impossible to keep her hands from slipping under the hems again, and Kate’s followed suit, as if hands and skin were magnetic poles pulled irresistibly together. Cold hands warmed quickly, set more fires, teased along the edges of bras and knickers. Kate’s skin was so incredibly smooth, a hypothesis Osgood could believe she was verifying; she couldn’t stop touching Kate’s skin, never wanted to.
Eventually, they had run out of places to touch each other with clothes on, and had got up to undress. Kate had finished first, because apparently even imminent sex with your almost illegally beautiful boss wasn’t enough to shut up the OCD brainweasels insisting that all your clothes had to be neatly folded and stacked in a pile. Kate hadn’t seemed to mind, though, had just sat on the edge of the bed next to her and stroked her bare arms and back as she finished folding. Osgood had felt the weight of Kate’s contemplative gaze on her naked form, and then felt a little icy thrill through her heart, and gooseflesh that had nothing to do with the cold.
When she had turned around and seen Kate, she had forgotten how words worked until Kate started to lean over to turn off the lamp.
Osgood had stopped her with a hand on her wrist. “Please. I want to see you.”
Kate looked…startled? As if she had somehow never realized that this was a thing Osgood would want. She gave a self-deprecating laugh. “I’m a few years past being a pin-up model.”
“You’re beautiful,” Osgood had said, because it was true, and the only thing that mattered.
And Kate had looked like she wanted to argue, but then had kissed her and led her to bed instead, pulling the blanket over the pair of them.
After the first few minutes of kissing and touching, now with one hundred percent less clothing, it had become obvious that Osgood was going to have to take her glasses off before she accidentally stabbed Kate’s eyes with one of the corners. Kate slipped them off and set them next to the inhaler, and as she settled back into bed her leg slid between Osgood’s thighs and Osgood gasped, wrapping her left leg around Kate almost in reflex. It seemed to her that they had been doing this forever, and not nearly long enough: kissing, touching, their bodies pressing and sliding against each other. And now legs pressing between legs, and fingers stroking over hips and breasts and shoulder blades and the hollows of their necks…The feel of Kate’s skin was amazing, addictive, a drug–not only in the obvious places like the swell of her breasts and the curve of her buttocks, but everywhere, the dip of her wrist and the slight curve of her stomach and the soft hairs at the nape of her neck. They were touching and touching and it was never enough, it was never going to be enough, she had to keep going, kissing and touching and gasping and gripping and–It felt so good, and Osgood had only just started wondering when the actual sex was going to start when she realized almost simultaneously that this was the sex, that she was having sex right now. It was a thing that was actually happening, in the real world outside her head. Kate was actually rolling Osgood onto her back, her thigh pressing harder between Osgood’s legs, and Kate was really truly and all in all factual and verifiable ways actually leaving teasing licks along her neck and then kissing–and then she started nipping, lightly, at the skin once she was below where marks might show above Osgood’s collar, and Osgood melted at the care in that gesture, that Kate was still looking out for her in this moment, was still thinking of her in all other moments outside this one, and oh, her mouth felt so warm and so hungry and so good…
Osgood strained up to return the favor and wend her way down to Kate’s collarbone, encouraged by the other woman’s not quite stifled gasps as she made her way to the soft skin between Kate’s breasts–and then her breasts and oh god, she was kissing Kate’s breasts, those were her lips closing over Kate’s nipple, her tongue flicking out over Kate’s stiffening tip, it was Kate’s breath caught in her throat, Kate’s husky murmur starting out as words of praise and falling apart into indecipherable pleasure.
Osgood couldn’t help but press up against Kate in response, and Kate rewarded her with her hand between Osgood’s legs, a faint touch on her clit and then ghosting over her entrance, then dipping in, the tips of her fingers, then withdrawing, a teasing press of her knuckles instead, her wrist, her fingers again, sliding inside this time, dipping and curling and weaving a pattern of desire, winding Osgood’s desire around and around her skillful fingers, Osgood could feel her desire coiling tight inside her, heating up, almost too hot, almost too good, her breath coming fast and her skin sweat-slicked as she pressed up against Kate’s hand because she’s not allowed to feel so good, she wanted to tell Kate to stop, she wanted to tell her to never stop, she wanted both these things at the same time and the same intensity, it felt so good, it had never felt so good before, oh god–
“I need a minute.”
Her breath had been so short that the words had barely made it out, and she could see the concern already in Kate’s eyes as the older woman pulled back, and that wasn’t what Osgood had wanted, that hadn’t meant what she meant at all–
So she had pushed Kate back and up onto her knees; she had seen Kate’s mouth opening in a question but she was already sliding down the bed until she was in exactly the right spot to answer the other woman with her hands on Kate’s hips to pull herself up between her legs, and then her mouth on Kate, kissing and licking, circling her clit and diving deep, imitating every movement of Kate’s fingers inside her with enthusiasm, the taste of Kate as addictive as the feel of her, she needed to make Kate feel what she was feeling, she needed to make Kate come undone–
And Kate’s hands were tangled in Osgood’s hair, and Kate’s hands were trembling, and Kate’s voice was trembling as she said Osgood’s name over and over until Osgood thought she must combust from secondhand passion, but she didn’t need to come half as much as need to make Kate come–
A moan, Kate shifting her weight, and then a clicking sound to Osgood’s right that she barely registered, and then a slightly pained breath:
“Osgood, my knees, I need–”
She pulled Kate down right on top of her, and Kate’s hips jerked against her mouth, startled, and she came.
There was just a half-second of stillness, Kate’s full weight on top of her, before Kate rolled off of her, sliding down the bed to kiss her firmly and deeply. “You are certainly full of surprises.”
Osgood kissed her again, and smiled against her lips.
Kate’s fingers were stroking figure eights around Osgood’s hips as she held her. Her thumb made lazy circles against Osgood’s thigh, until Osgood let out a slow breath and let her legs fall apart.
Kate pressed a kiss to her neck, close-mouthed, gentle. “Is this all right?”
Kate’s fingers slid inside her, and Osgood whimpered.
“You’re sure it’s all right?”
“It feels good,” Osgood insisted. “It feels–”
Her words were cut off by her own moan as Kate crooked her fingers, finding a spot that made her see stars, her vision going black and red at the corners.
Kate pressed another kiss, this one to her temple, where her hair had gone all sweaty and stuck. “I can stop anytime if you want.”
“Don’t stop. I want–”
She reached out for Kate, the angle awkward until Kate propped herself above Osgood, and then she was mimicking her movements, and Kate was making the same noises she was making, and her hips were pumping upward for Kate’s touch and Kate’s hair was falling down around her like a curtain that brushed against her cheek with each rocking movement, and she was safe, she felt so good and she was safe and she was so close and–
Osgood came, and Kate cried out above her; Osgood was pretty sure she had made her come again.
Kate flopped down on top of her, breathless. Kissed her shoulder. “One moment. Get my breath back.”
“I fell asleep, didn’t I?” Kate’s voice broke the post-coital silence.
“A little bit.”
Osgood could feel that raised eyebrow against her skin. “How little of a bit?”
Osgood twisted her head to squint at the clock radio; the numbers refuse to resolve out of a blur. “Maybe an hour?”
Kate sighed, letting her head drop back down onto Osgood’s shoulder. “This is what you get for seducing an old lady.”
Osgood decided to let the questionable definition of ‘seducing’ stand in favor of going after the larger error. “You’re not old.”
Kate just chuckled and shook her head. They were both silent for a bit, enjoying holding each other.
“Am I crushing you?” Kate asked after awhile.
“I like it,” Osgood said shyly.
Kate smiled. “Well, let me know if you’d like to crush me for a bit.” She paused, then went on, carefully casual. “That might be an idea for next time.”
Giddiness bubbled up inside Osgood like soda, but she kept her tone cautious. “There’s…going to be a next time?”
“I’d hope so. If you’re amenable.” Kate’s body was suddenly rather tense, though her tone stayed dry. “I was planning on bribing you with pancakes in the morning.”
“That would be nice,” Osgood said. She dared to press a little kiss to the top of Kate’s head. “Doing this another time. And pancakes.”
“Would you like to get dinner Thursday, then?” Kate asked. She slid her arm between Osgood and the mattress to hold her closer. “I’d like to see more of you.”
“You’ve already seen a lot of me,” Osgood pointed out with a smirk.
There was an answering smirk against her shoulder. “Cheeky.”
“I’m still getting used to the idea that you want to have sex with me. A date would be…wow. Also, yes.”
“You should have more confidence in yourself,” Kate said sleepily.
“Yes, ma’am,” Osgood said, snuggling closer. And incidentally, wow, calling someone ‘ma’am’ while cuddling up to them naked was an entirely different experience than calling them that in the cold light of day. Did she have an authority kink? Osgood was tentatively hypothesizing that she had an authority kink.
That could be another idea for next time.