Author's Notes:
Written for Challenge 084: Charade at dw100.

Spoilers: The Husbands Of River Song.

Summary: It’s bad enough that River doesn’t recognise him, but finding she’s married someone else in his absence…

It comes as something of a relief to realise that River’s ‘marriage’ to the monstrous and very untidy King Hydroflax is a sham, a charade, an act to keep her close to him until she figures out a way to get at the priceless diamond lodged in his brain.

Now that’s the River the Doctor knows, sneaky, unprincipled, larcenous, and attracted to shiny things. The universe isn’t about to implode after all; it just seemed like it might for a bit.

On the other hand, she’s talking about murdering someone… Perhaps he shouldn’t have left her alone for so long.

The End