Character Study, General, Introspection, Standalone, Vignette
Written for falknerâs prompt âDoctor Who, the Doctor, after every regeneration a lot of things feel as if it were the first time he did themâ at fic_promptly.
With each regeneration comes a new, untested body, complete with new senses and a world of unfamiliar sensations to experience. It’s as close as anyone can get to being born anew, and it’s both terrifying and exhilarating. So much uncertainty, so much confusion, but oh the sheer pleasure of seeing, feeling, hearing, touching, tasting…
It’s far from the first time he’s done any of these things, but at the same time, everything is new. He’s never seen with these eyes before, touched with these fingers, sniffed with this particular nose. It’s a big nose this time, all the better to smell with, and he finds himself sniffing everything he can, just to test it out.
The simplest things are a delight. It’s the first time he’s dressed this body, made a cup of tea, tasted fruit (he still hates pears), seen the sun shining down and felt its warmth. Everything is so new and fresh that it could be another universe he’s exploring instead of the same old one seen through different eyes, interpreted through an unfamiliar brain. It’s almost dizzying, in a wonderful, thrilling way and for an instant he regrets the knowledge that the newness will inevitably fade and he’ll once again become that old, jaded soul who’s seen and done it all so many times that there are precious few surprises left to discover.
But he pushes the creeping dark mood aside, gives himself over completely to the delights of having a brand new body and reminds himself that even though the newness will inevitably pass and he’ll eventually run out of ‘firsts’ for this particular body, there will be other new bodies in his future. It’s not the last time he’ll get to do everything for the first time, not by a long shot; the thought makes his new self laugh for the first time and he feels like dancing for the sheer joy of it.