The first thing you know is this: you are alive. There is no second thing: you’re almost innocent. It hurts.
So you dress yourself in velvet, comfort fabric, and realize some more things: you have two hearts but still need Grace. You don’t notice the mark of death clinging to your toe.
Millennium! Everyone parties like it’s 1999. Meanwhile, you and Grace save the world.
Your home is beautiful from space. Grace won’t follow you.
As she walks away, you notice the death tag, forgotten inside your shoe. You will always be marked, and Grace will never come to Gallifrey.