Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or its characters.
Category: Character Reflections; Romance
Spoilers: Up to They Keep Killing Suzie
"I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act.”
- Abraham H. Maslow (1908-1970) American Psychologist, Philosopher
Owen smiled as he watched Gwen shift in the bed she had been asleep for awhile now. His thin dark color sheet cover very little of her body since she was lying on her stomach. Bending over he kissed her shoulder as he slipped out of the bed. Slipping on his pajama bottoms he walked over to the window. So much had happened today that most of it seemed unreal. Looking back at Gwen he let out a deep sigh Suzie had almost killed her–again. But this time it affected him, this time he wanted to kill Suzie himself.
Gwen had asked him about Suzie and him, asked about what they were. Owen frowned he didn’t know how to answer that question really. They were never an official couple, she didn’t come to him like Gwen did and he didn’t go to her like he did with Gwen. They just seemed to find themselves in each other’s bed a few times. He didn’t even know how it began each time, it just did and then it was over. She had been his friend; she had helped him deal with being in Torchwood. And a few times she used sex as a way to help him deal. There was no emotion or feelings behind it, it was the only way to help him stay sane.
Yet it was nothing like it was with Gwen. He and Gwen used sex in the same manner he was trying to keep her sane. But Gwen didn’t do anything without adding emotion into it. Owen realized soon that was what he loved about her most of all. He knew what she was feeling when he looked into her eyes or he watched her body language. Like when they were eating with Tosh. She kept nibbling on her bottom lip she knew that drove him crazy, but it was her way of telling him she was going home with him.
Walking away from the window he wanted to watch her sleep again. Her head was almost completely healed by the time they made it back to Torchwood. All the way back she held onto him, she needed his contact. Jack took none of this in, he was too preoccupied with the fact he killed Suzie. Owen closed his eyes as the memory of her on the ground came back to him, he didn’t want to lose her.
Gwen was different then Suzie, she was not her replacement in anything. Gwen was as passionate about her work at Torchwood as she was in his bed. Pulling the covers aside he slipped back in, grinning as he heard her mumbled his name. Owen wondered if she ever did that with Rhys, he wasn’t sure if he would even notice. Moving her hair aside he took a deep breath as he realized how in trouble he was.
He was falling in love with her, and he knew that he should stop. He should tell her they need to end their affair, but he won’t. He wanted her he had become addicted to her and their lovemaking. Settling back in he closed his eyes and allowed the scent that was Gwen Cooper feel his nose. There was nothing he could do about his past and there was little he could do about his future it seemed. All he could do right now, was live for today. This was exactly what he planned to do. And if he could manage to win Gwen’s heart in the process, well then it would be a good day.