Words cannot express the awesome. I nearly DIED with laughter. I sat here snorting in a very undignified manner throughout, and for a good four minutes afterward. I've never seen Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, and before I Googled it just now I was assuming it was a book, but I will be watching it now to see where you could possibly have got such a lulzy idea from.
Holy crap! I laughed so hard I got a cramp @ "manfruit" and by "And he was an alien" I had to go lie down. Sooo hilarious!!
LOL!
You are evil. Evil. I hate you so much. *whimpers*
Jack's lucky he's immortal. Unless he'd rather stay dead - I wouldn't blame him.
I can has brain-bleach naow?
Once again nos, you win everything ever. You've totally got Garth's narrative voice down pat.
I would like to repay you for this fantastic read by making you egg and soup sometime.